there’s nothing better than griffin mcelroy completely apathetically and deadpan doing a bit while his brothers literally choke on their breath screaming with laughter in the background
oh sorry sorry but this is FALSE—patently FALSE—information because i’m pretty sure what’s better is Justin struggling to get through what is probably not even a very good bit while his brothers shout over him and also each other in the background
what’s REALLY good is when Travis and Griffin are deadpan bouncing back and forth with a bit while you can hear Justin animorphing into a whistling teakettle in the background
The other day I went to McDonald’s with my family and the guy who took my order was really loud and was basically like “HAPPY HOLIDAYS WHAT CAN I GET YOU” and I was like wow I can’t let this guy outmatch me so I yelled “I’LL TAKE A HAPPY MEAL WITH THE NUG NUGS IF I MAY” you know, like a natural well-adjusted epitome of adulthood 19 year old and he was like “CERTAINLY WOULD YOU LIKE THE MIGHTY KIDS MEAL INSTEAD WITH EXTRA FRIES” and I was so sleep deprived I essentially blacked out and apparently leaned over the counter like I was robbing the place, raised my eyebrow like a suave robin hood and said “HECK YES I WOULD GOOD SIR” and then I sat down and he yelled from across the store “WOULD YOU LIKE THE PURPLE OR BLUE SPIDER-MAN” and since purple is the more superior color that’s how I answered and long story short my parents think college changed me and that I’m now the poster child for being social and I’ve only been asked once why I’m not in a relationship yet but I know it’s gonna be brought up again and how do i tell my parents it’s because whenever I eat in the dining hall I spend the entire time playing bumper cars with the wheeley chairs and all I eat is pixie sticks and the last time I was in the library (where I’m supposed to work next semester, deAr GoD) I ripped my leggings in the bathroom pulling up my pants and I walked the entire 20 mins back to my dorm with my neon underwear peeking out from the holes like a 17th century harlot with a cocaine addiction and I’ve essentially been living off jars of peanut butter and the soundtrack to the bee movie for the past year
there’s more information in this post than there was in the library of alexandria
youd think horses were one of those animals that has horrible health due to humans breeding unhealthy animals to achieve a certain look but no they really are just naturally that fucked up
horses’ lungs bleed when they run at a certain speed
if their diet is too rich / low in selenium their hooves fall off
excuse me
The reason they have such poor health outcomes after breaking or otherwise injuring their legs is because their legs are actually hyper-specialized fingers; and as in human fingers, there is very little muscle supporting the bone, just a lot of cartilage and tendons and whatnot. You’d think an animal that literally evolved to run away to avoid being eaten would have ALSO evolved sturdier running appendages, but…
I fucking hate this post, it’s 1 AM I don’t want to know that horse legs are giant fucking fingers
normal internet denizens who have friends: Oh yes, the chat application that replaced skype a long time ago, I spend much of my time socializing on there
me: i;gm howling at the moon
anyone: tiktok
normal ppl well-versed in internet culture: Oh yes, the short video hosting app that’s gained popularity in the wake of vine’s demise as a platform for video memes that I know all about and watch regularly
me: tik tok,. on the clock, but the party dont stop no,
spiderman helping out the owner of a local art store and them giving him a spiderman discount so now miles only goes in there if hes in his suit
Art store owner realises his secret identity because miles was one of his favourite customers and now he’s suddenly stopped coming in
miles mentions he has to go to the art supply store and jefferson INSISTS on taking him on the way home from school on friday so he can Learn More about his son’s hobby and the owner gives him the fucking discount and miles just dies inside
Jefferson is like “hey why’d you leave so quick” and he’s just like “haha, I just remembered I had to swing by some other places after” and Jefferson adds another post it note to his secret conspiracy board of Is Miles Spiderman
swing by you say
Spiders-men are incapable of avoiding puns it’s their biggest weakness
Tumblr is literally a social experiment to see how long an extremely alienated user base will continue to use a declining social media platform that sporadically removes its features until rendering it obsolete
Remember this years-old post?
What the experiment demonstrates is that I will put up with all of that just to use a site that shows me posts that I asked for in chronological order.
^^the key function of this site
the key function of this site is not asking me for my real name/phone number and not using my contact list/other apps to find people/let people find me.
Every single person involved in a theater production, not just the main stars becuase without the ensemble, stage/tech crew, orchestra, directors, choreographers, costume designers, and make up artists there would be no show!!!!
I’m torn between what my favorite brother faction fights are, Justin and Travis vs Griffin aka “older siblings make their baby brother cry”, Griffin and Travis vs Justin aka “we spend a long time finding these questions but yeah cool here comes another munch squad”, or Justin and Griffin vs Travis aka “travis what the Fuck Are You Talking About”
The best mcelroy family faction fight though is Justin, Travis, and Griffin vs Clint aka “What the fuck dad”
this is missing the classic travis and griffin vs justin aka “travis and griffin heckle justin so hard through a stupid two second joke that it takes him five minutes to get through it”
